Tag Archives: NOVA SAS

Tip of the Week: Stalking

A stalker is not always an unknown person lurking in the shadows. In fact, on college campuses the stalker is often not a stranger at all. Four out of five campus victims know their attacker. These perpetrators have an intimate relationship or close friendship; they may be classmates, co-workers, neighbors, acquaintances, or related to their victims.
What can YOU do if you are being stalked?
• Contact NOVA Sexual Assault services for free confidential help from trained advocates.
• Tell the important people in your life what is happening.
• Reach out to your campus conduct office.
• Make a plan. Consider changing your routine and travel with another person.
• Keep a record of all harassing messages, take screen shots and print-outs for evidence.
• Call NOVA Police, where you can file a report and receive legal assistance.

If you or someone you know is being stalked, contact a 24 hour NOVA Sexual Assault Services Coordinator for free confidential support. Please call or text 703.338.0834 or email NOVA.SAS@nvcc.edu. For more information and resources about stalking, please visit http://www.nvcc.edu/novacares/sas/stalking.html

National Vision Wall: September 2019

Imagine a world without sexual violence, what’s different?

(This was the question that was asked and these are the responses received.  Numbers behind the statement indicate how many times this particular statement was made.)

 

09.24.2019 Annandale Campus

  • I wouldn’t have had to grow up too fast. I could have enjoyed my childhood.
  • Free to get out at night x3
  • It’s a common misconception but men should feel the need to speak up when they are sexually abused!
  • Men wouldn’t be reliant on toxic behavior and would be more mindful and emotionally intelligent.
  • Everyone will be free x 4
  • Stay strong! You’re wonderful no matter what
  • Less murders
  • Less stress, feeling safe and more confidence x6
  • I would sleep better
  • Ability to love wholeheartedly
  • Respect to others would rise and fear between genders would diminish. A peaceful world.
  • There would be more freedom between all genders in all places like the subway!
  • One less hard conversation to have
  • Happy life and women would love themselves more. Avoiding pregnancy that they don’t wish.
  • Humanity would thrive and be unified
  • I wouldn’t need to double check my locks
  • Peaceful, safe and sound
  • I wouldn’t need to worry about wearing short skirts
  • Sweet dreams, good life
  • People are more friendlier and confident
  • A safer world for women, children and men
  • The world would be at peace
  • I would be able to walk outside comfortably
  • The world would be such a better place without worries for little girls and boys over what to wear and people destroying their lives
  • Happy x5
  • So much better x 5
  • No fear and no trauma
  • Less fear x5
  • We would be more confident in our bodies x3
  • It’s childish! We need to make better decisions. We are better than this. #savelives #protectwomen
  • More peaceful less violence
  • Less worry, less hate, less evil… My type of world
  • More love in the world
  • Progress
  • I wouldn’t have depression from past bullying
  • Better future
  • Wear whatever we want
  • Don’t let your past define you!! You’re not alone
  • Men and women would view each other as equals
  • More successful marriages
  • People would be open to try new things
  • No more child brides!
  • STOP THE MADNESS
  • Everyone would get along and be happy… not afraid of others
  • Women are not objects! Simple as it is! Respect us
  • Her/his body is not yours
  • Don’t need to walk with a knife
  • Never lie, never doubt, never fear, never cry
  • More trust
  • Full of love
  • Women would be happier to express themselves. the freedom of expression through clothing
  • Freedom of cloths
  • Not enough sticky notes to say. Many people would have been saved. PEACE OF MIND
  • No more social nervousness in public
  • Less therapy needed
  • Consent
  • Feel safe walking home
  • No more bully by the culture or disapproval by the same group of people
  • IT NEEDS TO COME TO AN END
  • STOP THINKING WOMEN ARE YOUR TARGET
  • Take down the institution of white patriarchy! The world suffers too much from them
  • Families would be happier together
  • Better, safer
  • Women feeling safer alone in public. Men shouldn’t fear that falsehood affect their future
  • A place where people have one less thing to worry about
  • When you speak up you are better
  • Love and affection
  • If the devil has to ask permission from Judas, what does say someone who doesn’t even ask for consent
  • Nothing to worry about, and less problems
  • You are great just the way you are
  • Women in CHARGE!
  • Women would not be afraid of expressing themselves
  • Say what you mean and mean what you say
  • GREAT
  • Amazing
  • What would you gain from sexual violence? NOTHING! I thought so too
  • My father shouldn’t have to warn me about boys

 

09.25.2019 Annandale Campus

 

  • A world filled with true happiness and equality. A world like that should be normal
  • A safe feeling
  • A wonderful world
  • Always love yourself
  • It would be a world where women would feel safe to accept themselves and own their sexuality without fear of judgment or harassment.
  • There would be more interpersonal trust between people and strangers
  • I wouldn’t be afraid to walk when its dark
  • People won’t feel ashamed anymore
  • More peaceful
  • My sister wouldn’t be scared to go clubbing with me
  • A perfect society
  • Better and safer
  • I would go back to my country without the fear of being raped or killed
  • Bring peace to the world. We all own one
  • Children can freely play around in the community. Women can enjoy free times safely
  • Freedom to be who I’ve always wanted to be
  • Children will be happy. Not scared when they’re alone
  • Walking in the streets with no fear
  • Parents wouldn’t worry this much anymore. I would be ok all alone
  • Better world
  • I wouldn’t have to worry what I wear, what I’m doing, where I’m going.
  • Families would stick together
  • We can all stick together and be there for each other
  • Equality
  • The world wouldn’t be the same without you
  • No fear
  • Better place
  • Wearing a short skirt wouldn’t be an issue
  • Women rule! Women power!
  • Women would be ahead of men and there would be a unified culture
  • Safer place
  • Supporting each other
  • There would be less dramas for the victims
  • People would feel safer regardless of what they wore
  • A lot less cases of powerful people getting off scott free
  • A world where people can live with confidence that when they walk out their own they’ll be safe
  • Everyone would be happy. Everyone would have self-confident on everything they do
  • Taking walks alone at night
  • A whole lot better
  • My daughters and granddaughters would not have to worry about their safety
  • I wouldn’t have to question everyday if I was bad enough
  • Less stress less lies
  • Learn without fear. I would remember more of my life. More opportunities

 

SAS Fall Semester Outreach Events

We are hoping you will stop by some of our 2019 Fall Semester SAS Outreach events. Volunteers are welcome. Comment on this post to send us a private message or email us at NOVA.SAS@nvcc.edu, or call 703-338-0834 if you are interested in volunteering at any of our upcoming events.

Healthy Relationships Week! Tip: What is an Abusive Relationship?

Abusive relationships come in all different shapes and sizes. If your partner doesn’t let you wear certain things or gets upset when you wear certain clothing in public, that is abuse. If your partner gets upset at YOU when other people give you attention you may not have wanted, that is also abuse. Physical violence isn’t the only form of abuse. To find resources or get more information on domestic violence (dating/partner violence), visit http://www.nvcc.edu/novacares/sas/dating.html. To contact a 24 hour NOVA Sexual Assault Services coordinator for free confidential support, please call 703.338.0834 or email NOVA.SAS@nvcc.edu.

In celebration of Valentine’s Day NOVA SEXUAL ASSAULT SERVICES (known as “SAS”) will be visiting the Manassas, Loudoun, Woodbridge, Annandale and Alexandria NOVA Campuses to share information on Healthy Relationships. Stop by our table where you can gather information on HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS and create your own handmade Valentine’s Day Cards for family, friends or that special someone in your life for free!

 

 

Manassas – Thursday, Feb 7th from 10-2 – Howsman Cafeteria
Loudoun – Monday, February 11th from 11-2 – LC Cafe
Alexandria – Tuesday, February 12th from 11-2 – Bisdorf Cafeteria
Woodbridge – Wednesday, February 13th from 10:30 – 1:30 – WAS Café
Annandale – Thursday, February 14th from 11-2 – CA 3rd Floor

Hope to see you there and bring your friends!

 

https://www.nvcc.edu/novacares/sas/dating.html

NOVA SAS Project – Vision Wall: Imagine a World Without Sexual Violence!

Imagine a World Without Sexual Violence!  What would be different????  Stop by our outreach events this semester and let your voice be heard on our Vision Wall!  Just write a note (it’s anonymous) to be added to the Vision Wall on what the world would be like without sexual violence.

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Help us spread awareness and show support to victims and survivors by participating in The Clothesline Project. Happening at the MEC today (October 3) and tomorrow from 10am – 3pm!

 

NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AWARENESS MONTH

National Domestic Violence Awareness Month is an annual designation observed in October. For many, home is a place of love, warmth, and comfort. It’s somewhere that you know you will be surrounded by care and support, and a nice little break from the busyness of the real world. But for millions of others, home is anything but a sanctuary. The U.S. Department of Justice estimates that 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are victims of physical violence by a partner every year.

Every 9 seconds, a woman in the U.S. is beaten or assaulted by a current or ex-significant other.

Here’s another shocking statistic: the number of U.S. troops killed in Afghanistan and Iraq between 2001 and 2012 is 6,488. The number of women that were murdered by current or ex-male partners during that same time frame is 11,766, according to the Huffington Post. That’s almost double the number of people that were killed fighting in war. People who are in an abusive relationship will stay with their partner for a number of reasons:

-Their self-esteem is totally destroyed, and they are made to feel they will never be able to find another person to be with.

-The cycle of abuse, meaning the ‘honeymoon phase’ that follows physical and mental abuse, makes them believe their partner really is sorry, and does love them.

-It’s dangerous to leave. Women are 70 times more likely to be killed in the weeks after leaving their abusive partner than at any other time in the relationship, according to the Domestic Violence Intervention program.

-They feel personally responsible for their partner, or their own behavior. They are made to feel like everything that goes wrong is their fault.

They share a life. Marriages, children, homes, pets, and finances are a big reason victims of abuse feel they can’t leave.

HOW TO OBSERVE

Use #DomesticViolenceAwareness to post on social media. Sometimes, people don’t know if they are really in an abusive relationship because they’re used to their partner calling them crazy or making them feel like all the problems are their own fault. Here are a few ways to know if you’re in an abusive relationship that you need to get out of.

  1. Your partner has hit you, beat you, or strangled you in the past.
  2. Your partner is possessive. They check up on you constantly wondering where you are; they get mad at you for hanging out with certain people if you don’t do what they say.
  3. Your partner is jealous. (A small amount of jealousy is normal and healthy) however, if they accuse you of being unfaithful or isolate you from family or friends, that means the jealousy has gone too far.
  4. Your partner puts you down. They attack your intelligence, looks, mental health, or capabilities. They blame you for all of their violent outbursts and tell you nobody else will want you if you leave.
  5. Your partner threatens you or your family.
  6. Your partner physically and sexually abuses you. If they EVER push, shove, or hit you, or make you have sex with them when you don’t want to, they are abusing you (even if it doesn’t happen all the time.)

HISTORY

Domestic Violence Awareness Month evolved from the “Day of Unity” held in October 1981 and conceived by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. The “Day of Unity” soon evolved into a week, and in October of 1987, the first National Domestic Violence Awareness Month was observed. In 1989 Congress passed Public Law 101-112, officially designating October of that year as National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Such legislation has been passed each year since.

As this month comes to an end, the important discussion it brings to the forefront about domestic violence’s horrific repercussions should not.

If you are experiencing domestic abuse, please click here for help. If you are in danger, call 911.

 

Tip of the Week: Consent Matters

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Consent Matters!

Consent is a clear and unambiguous agreement, expressed in mutually understandable words or actions, to engage in a particular activity. In order for sexual activity to be consensual, ALL individuals involved must want and agree to everything that takes place. Silence or no response does NOT equal YES. Consent is unimpaired – only someone who is mentally present and uninfluenced by external factors such as substances can give consent. A person may change his/her mind even after saying “yes” initially. Sexual activity after that point is a form of sexual assault. Just because you have engaged in sexual acts with the individual once before, it does not mean the answer is always an implied yes.

Respect your partner’s answer: NO MEANS NO

To learn more please visit:

http://www.nvcc.edu/novacares/resources.html

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Tip of the Week: Warning Signs of Dating/Partner Violence

Dating/partner violence is a pattern of behaviors between individuals who are or have been involved in an intimate relationship in which an individual inflicts emotional, financial, psychological, sexual and/or physical harm to his/her partner to assert power and control. Dating/partner violence is abuse within an intimate relationship regardless of marital status and does not depend on whether the couple lives together. It happens in heterosexual and same-sex relationships. Some behaviors within dating/partner violence are considered criminal.

If you or someone you know sees the warning signs in their relationship then remember you are not alone and that you have the option to seek help. You can always reach out to NOVACares by filling out the NOVACares report or by contacting NOVA Sexual Assault Services (SAS) directly at nova.sas@nvcc.edu or 703-338-0834.

http://www.nvcc.edu/novacares/index.html

Below are a list of warning signs
 Explosive temper
 Using physical violence such as choking, pushing or hitting
 Extreme jealousy or insecurity
 Checking emails, cellphones and social media without permission
 Isolation from family and friends
 Controlling partner’s movements or decisions and/or finances
 Coercing or forcing partner to engage in unwanted or nonconsensual sexual acts
 Constantly insulting or putting down partner and/or humiliating partner in public or in front of loved ones
 Making false accusations
 Possessiveness

http://www.isthisabusive.com/…/2013/02/abusivechecklist1.jpg